Since I have been following this protocol I never get that buildup of plaque behind the lower front incisors. I’ve tested with harsh critics and my breath is as fresh when I roll out of bed in the morning as it was when I went to sleep.

Hey, it was minty fresh when I went to sleep, please continue reading non-sarcastically, thank you.

This protocol comes from the book Kiss Your Dentist Goodbye.

I’m not going to go too much into justifying why the protocol works, only that it does, if you’d like to know more read the book (please read it non-sarcastically).

The first step is taking xylitol mints throughout the day. Xylitol can’t be digested by odor and plaque causing bacteria so they die of starvation.

Take that, bacteria.

People with bad breath are extremely compassionate. They can’t find it in their hearts to harm single-celled organisms.

Then there’s the rest of us. Burn bacteria, burn.

The teeth brushing protocol is twice a day, once in the evening and once again whenever it’s inconvenient, like while you’re practicing your stand-up comedy routine.

Hey, you can make some convenient time in the morning. Slow it down and you’ll live longer, besides the whole process only takes about 3 minutes,  no excuses.

That would be hilarious to see you try to incorporate it into your stand-up though, send me your videos.

Don’t actually try to incorporate this into your stand-up act, mouthwash wasn’t designed to be inhaled.

If you chemists out there just came up with a bright idea please remember to mention my name at the patent office. Breath freshening asthmatic inhalers anyone?


1) Rinse/swish 30 seconds with Closys Oral Health Rinse
You can get this at Walgreens or Amazon

2) Floss

3) Brush teeth with basic toothpaste like crest or colgate. I used to do this for 3 to 5 minutes and still get that plaque build-up on the incisors. Now about 1 minute does the trick for me, no more plaque.

4) 30 second rinse with listerine. While you’re doing this put some listerine in a shot glass or other container and swish your toothbrush around inside (also 30 seconds). Then leave your toothbrush somewhere to dry fully.

This step is vital. If you don’t clean your brush then bacteria on your brush is going to be fruitful and multiply. The next time you brush you’re introducing that bacteria back into your mouth and gums. Let’s be logical, you wouldn’t clean a car with a greasy rag and neither should you brush with a dirty brush.

The author includes one more step at the end, which is rinsing with fluoride, but I’m on the fence as to the benefits of fluoride so I have never really incorporated that step.

Use your own discretion, leaving it out seems to work fine for me.